Wednesday, February 21, 2007

This Is News?

Elvis was the new Messiah
The apocalypse began yesterday
And we are all living in Hell.
Taunted by big busted bleached blonde bimbos
With a craving for sex on the next Geraldo
-Jim Stoddard, "Geraldo Stomp" 1988

Every morning when I arrive at work, I'm confronted by the old crone and old fag I work with, asking me for my opinion on the recent development in the Anna Nicole case, or the latest antics of britney Spears. Blissfully unaware, I ask what those may be, when one of them asks, "Don't you watch the news?"
What has happened to our news providers? Are these people so important that they need to be constantly covered by "serious" journalists? Haven't we all had enough of bleach blonde skanks? (I know I have) I informed my co-workers that I never watch the news, and they reply, "Then how do you know what's going on in the world?"
The local Fox affiliate has news at ten amd every Tuesday they run a segment entitled "Idol Notes", which is a recap of what you just watched for the last two hours on their station. No wonder we're in the state we're in, our attention spans are so shortened we have to be reminded every couple of hours what we just watched. Is it a conspiracy that every morning radio show plays highlights from American Idol?
Real news are stories such as the second US carrier arrrives off Iran. We should all be discussing how the idiots in charge are ready to plunge the US into WWIII,, not the latest developments in the Anna Nicole story, which effects two, maybe three people and the rest of us can just fuck off. How about the second largest food and beverage manufacturer laying off 8000 employees? It's okay though, because our idiot president says the economy's doing fine!
I get my news from the internet, because I can choose which stories I need to read, and which will have no bearing on my future. That's why I visit a lot of blogs, not only because I like to gain a different perspective, but because they may have found a story I hadn't.
The corporate media accomplishes two things, offering a non-stop distraction to the simple minded who can cluck their tongues at rich celebrities and say "It just goes to show you money doesn't buy everything". Right. If Britney Spears was just some homeless person with a shaved head do you think she'd garner any attention? Only if she was on the same street as you coming towards you, otherwise you'd look the other way as you passed her. But because she is a washed-up pop princess party girl displaying her pubeless pussy for the paparazzi, people feel they need to chime in and say "Think about her poor kids." Why don't you think about her poor children and stop giving her and her type the attention they crave and maybe they'll act right and her children won't have to grow up like this. But because you need to feel morally superior to a stranger, you cluck like a bunch of hens at feeding time. In the meantime, Bush is spending the country ino a debt we may never be able to pay, and you're not even smart enough to wonder who holds that debt.


Anonymous said...

Bleach blonde skank....that's nice

Frederick said...

"Don't you watch the news?"

Holy shit, I woulda flipped the fuck out right there.

annie said...

so true, lew.
it makes me crazier all the time, seeing just how shallow and detached so many are now.
i am consistently amazed at how many people i imagine to be intelligent, thoughtful people turn out to be huge american idol fans, who haven't a clue about what going on beyond that garbage.
blogs like yours keep me from completely losing it.

Anonymous said...

Actually... I think that Britney Spears got a tattoo, shaved her head, entered rehab (for 20 hours), and then arrived off the coast of Iran.

Or maybe I have that timeline wrong.

Undeniable Liberal said...

Excellent points, Lew, and I work with the same type of zombies that you do, apparently.
Fun fact: The US media is only about two things: Distracting us from our real problems, and making us afraid of whatever it is we're supposed to be afraid of that particular week.
In addition, Anna Nicole Smith is still dead and I am not the father of her baby. All Britney has left to shave is her eyebrows.

pissed off patricia said...

It is sincerely sad and disturbing that the two at your work place believe the starlet shit is actually news. That tells you all you need to know about how fucking stupid a part of our society really has become. Jeez!

I know if someone had asked me that question about didn't I watch the news, I would smarted off something that would have made them think I could go postal at any moment.

azgoddess said...

prefect -- don't you watch the news??

haa haa -- nope -- i read the 'real' news...

Snave said...

I haven't been following much of the "news" lately. Is Britney Spears the mother of Anna Nicole's baby? Who was going to be buried next to Kevin Federline? Anna Nicole's thirteenth ex-husband?


I used to like to watch TV news in the morning, on CNN Headline News. Now they have this giggly Robin and Company crap, and there is barely even any lip service to the fact that the world is already most of the way to hell in a handbasket. Most mainstream media news is just "entertainment" presented under the guise of "news".

I won't watch FOX "News", mainly on general principle... I tried to watch it for about 15 minutes last summer, and in that short amount of time I learned that the war in Iraq is going swimmingly well, the economy is booming, and that all America's Christians are being persecuted by evil left-wingers. I might as well have just turned on the local AM radio station and listened to Rush Limbaugh.

Network news offers us a nice escape from having to worry about the real problems in our world, I guess.

I'll stick with the News Hour on PBS, and C-Span (yes, I actually do watch it now and then, and I LIKE it), and various websites including MSN/MSNBC, Reuters, and NPR. Screw the major networks, screw the radio unless it's public broadcasting...

sumo said...

It's all a conspiracy by the media that is fed by the show fluffy stuff to keep our minds numbed to what is coming out of Iraq. That can be taken in many ways I suppose. It is important to me to keep up with the slow decomposition of Anna's's such a pity.