Banned by The Thought Police Nazis At Cracked.Com

I don't know how or when I discovered the craptions contest at Cracked.Com, but one thing I noticed when I did was the lack of funny material being offered up by the readers therein. Most of the jokes were of the FAIL/Lady Gaga/Gay variety, and few, if any, were anywhere near being humorous. Now, I consider myself to be a funny guy, so this seemed right up my alley.
The premise is this: the editors/administrators offer a picture and encourage readers to come up with a funny caption for it. The kind of stuff you may have done in high school, which is reflected in the mentality of many posts. Some people will use a catch phrase from a movie or Monty Python routine, whether or not it actually is funny in this situation. Then, once the phrase is offered, all registered users get to vote on it as being funny, and the one that garners the most votes over a twenty-four hour period is the winner.
The image below is one from last week, along with my submitted craption. Please note that the earlier you get your craption in, the more likely it will win, as the chance for others to see it is directly in conjunction with the number of votes it receives, because the ones with the higher votes are displayed at the top, along with the current vote leader. This particular submission by me was very popular, and didn't take long to rise to the top, where it was receiving the largest number of votes.

When I first viewed the picture, it reminded me of photos I had seen of the showers in Nazi Concentration Camps, where, once the gas was released, the victims would climb over each other to reach the fresh air at the top. Kind of like in this sculpture. So, connecting the two, I made my submission. By early evening, it was rapidly on it's way to becoming one of the highest vote-getters ever recorded. By nine o'clock, however, it was gone, deleted, deemed too offensive to readers who regularly use racist, homophobic and other disgusting words in an attempt to be funny.
What it meant was that the number two vote getter vaulted to the top, and while I voted for that one as well (Rapture gridlock), it didn't ease the sting of my loss. So, the very next day, regardless of the picture, I submitted the following craption
"Yeah, I was going to post some thing funny here, but the Thought Police Nazis at Cracked.Com would just delete it". Once again, it rose quickly to the number two position. And, once again, by nine o'clock, it was gone. But, even more disappointing, so was my profile at Cracked.Com. I had been banned from ever writing craptions, or voting on others craptions as well. I really think that a humor magazine web site would have a sense of humor, but I guess I was wrong. FAIL!

It's A McCain Thing, You Wouldn't Understand, But Then, Neither Does He

Arizona senator and former Republican presidential candidate told Newsweek recently "I never considered myself a maverick".
What McCain appparently considered considering himself was a Jeep, so he could appropriate "It's a McCain thing, you wouldn't understand", until an aide told him Jeep was a registered trademark of the Daimler-Chrysler Corporation.
"What I really meant to say," the mentally faltering politican stated, "was that I'm a 1969 Dodge Dart Swinger. Vroom!"
Aside from the missing McCain maverick meme, also conspicuous in it's absence was one-time Republican political operative Joe "Remember Me?" The Plumber Wurzelbacher who doesn't want anything to do with Sen. McCain. "He messed up my life," Wurzelbacher claimed, "Made me record a shitty country music album, ghost wrote my book then told people not to buy it, told me not to pay $1,182 in taxes to the state of Ohio, and cock blocked me when I was trying to nail Sarah Palin." So much for personal responsibility.
Of course, being a maverick means that sometimes you vote with the opposition, and in these days of super-mega-hyper-polarized politics, that doesn't fly. So, at the risk of looking more ridiculous than he looked two years ago, McCain has once again lost himself in his quest for office.

Gullibility Illustrated

Jesus has given us many things. The brightly colored eggs and jellybeans of Easter. The bright lights on evergreen trees surrounded by colorfully wrapped presents of Christmas.
But he has also brought us more wonderous things. Burning heretics at the stake. Institutionalized pedophilia. Kirk Cameron.
And, of course, the Rapture. The Rapture is an interpretation of the Bible by dispensationalists who feel that certain things must happen in order for Christians to be lifted up to the Heavens (good riddance) and the rest of the world to live in peace, but is never mentioned in the Bible. It's a secret Rapture only the truly saved (read:brainwashed) know about.
How brainwashed? Well, watch this video of a prank played on one unsuspecting and trusting soul, and you will understand that just because dispensationalists believe in war, hate and killing, doesn't mean that they don't have a sense of humor.

Ha! Funny or what?

It Would Be Better If We Paid You No Mind At All

One of the greatest problems facing our country is the fact that our foreign policy is decided on not what's best for America, but instead, on what's not best for America.
Take stark raving neocon Billy Kristol. He claims it would be better for the US to attack Iran than Israel. Better for Israel, that is. Ultimately, it would be better for no one to attack Iran, since they actually haven't been found to be doing thing which violates any law, but reasoning with a neocon is impossible, because they make their own reality, and insane people are impossible to rationalize with in any debate.
Kristol, it should be noted, was one the loudest voices calling for an attack against Iraq, but there's no use beating that dead horse. He is probably the last person anyone should listen to regard US foreign policy in the Middle East, but it doesn't stop the corporate media from putting him on anyway.
But there is a whole list of things that it would be better for America to do first.
As an example, it would be better if the US government would stop breaking it's own laws, and obey the Symington Amendment. The fact that both major parties seem to disregard this law is an apt illustration of why we need to dump them both in favor of a party that actually obeys laws instead of bowing to powerful lobbies.
It would be better if politicians ran as a friend of all Americans instead of as a friend of another country. The US should not be playing favorites with any country in the Middle east, especially one with so many UN violations against it.
It would be better for the US, already mired down in two wars-without-end, to not start a third one that will endanger more of our troops and cause the loss of more American lives. It would be better for the US not to be seen as an agressor in a region where many people already have developed a negative opinion of us. It would be better if we didn't needlessly harm more civilians tha the over one million Iraqis we have already killed in a genocide designed to calm Billy Kristol's paranoia.
The cost of the Iraq War is already three trillion dollars, another war in the region isn't going to be any cheaper. It would be better for the US if that money, on top of the $1.6 trillion in aid were reinvested in this country to rebuild our economy.
And in the end, it would be better for Mr. Kristol, wealthy publisher of The Weakly Standard and paid Fox News commentator, to buy his own fighter jet and fly it over to Iran himself. But unfortunately, Mr. Kristol hasn't met a war somebody else's kids lives couldn't be spent fighting so Mr. Kristol continue to be a drain on society by advocating US involvement in wars it would be better off not fighting.

Which Side Is Naomi Wolf On?

"Their views of liberals are just as distorted as ours are of conservatives."-Naomi Wolf
Gulp! Did author Naomi Wolf just admit to sympathy with the Teabaggers? How can the bastion of liberal journalism, lauded by the left for her book, The End of America, which describes the US's fall into Fascism under the Bush administration, be on the same page as the knuckle-dragging cavemen of the Patriot movement who only know two buttons on their television remotes?
There is also a deliberate building up of two camps that benefits from whipping up home team spirit and demonizing the opposition. With the Internet there is even more fractioning since we are in echo chambers. With so much propaganda it is hard to calm down enough to listen. Of course, you can't talk to a wingtard; They all watch and believe Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh. They never had a problem with the Patriot Act, or Guantanamo Bay, or 'enhanced interrogation' techniques under Bush, it's only when President Obama continues them that they worry about Fascism. Besides, I feel much better with my Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow, thank you very much.
And they call Obamacare Socialism! Don't they know that the individual mandate is actually a Republican giveaway to corporations (Only right wingers think the reason people don't have health insurance is because they don't want it, not because they can't afford it) Sure the bill is flawed, but a step towards a more corporate union is better when it's initiated by the Democrats, right?
I was basically saying don’t sit around waiting for the two corrupted established parties to restore the Constitution or the Republic. The founding generation was birthed by the rabble of all walks of life that got fed up and did risky things because they were captivated by the breath of liberty. There is a looming oligarchy and it is up to the people to organize a grassroots movement and push back. Wait a minute! Aren't DINOs better than Republicans, because without them, we wouldn't have our majority and the capacity to fix things, or at least the things that our rich corporate masters will allow us to fix, as long as they get to squeeze us for every penny in our pocket?
Sure, it's feels better to point the finger at the other team while the whole country is losing, but unless people realize that our government has been stolen from us by large corporations who don't care about anything but stock prices and year end bonuses. By using wedge issues in the corporate media, as well as polarizing politicians, they keep people not voting for things, but against things, including, our own best interests.

Socialized Heroin

“How can our kids say no when the adults around them are saying yes?” asked Aimee Hendle, a spokeswoman for Californians for Drug Free Youth.
Yes the rhetoric is heating up in California, where an initiative to legalize marijuana has been placed on the ballot. Does making something legal that was once illegal make it all better?
How about all those people sitting in jails for mere possession, will they be released? What about all the law enforcement people and companies that profit from terrorizing pot heads? Will this make it illegal to not hire someone because they tested positive for marijuana in a drug test?
But what about the children?
Ironically, a world away, as right wingers fear the release of the killer weed into the mainstream of public altered consciousness, NATO has rejected Russia's call to spray the poppy fields of Afghanistan. And not even all of the poppy fields, merely twenty five percent. So what does that say to the paranoiacs of California who think the cultivation of pot is really bad when their tax dollars are going to support the cultivation of the opium poppy?

Still No Change

The Obama administration, brought to power by claims of change, has proven that things have changed, only for the worse. Case in point: Cindy Sheehan, arrested in Saturday's antiwar march marking the seven year anniversary of the illegal US invasion of Iraq may be tried for her campaign. Huh? What? Even the Cheney/Bush administration was smart enough to know that trying a mother grieving over the loss of her son in a pointless unending war would make her a martyr, President Obama was supposed to be smarter than that.
Let's see, teabaggers can protest all they want, hurl invectives and slurs at members of Congress, and they go unpunished. But make a point about the senseless cost of war, and well, it's off to the hoosegow with you.
Of course this was the same Obama campaign that promised talks with Iran without any preconditions Now we have increased calls by members of the administration as well as members of congress for tougher sanctions against Iran. You know, sanctions like we had had with Iraq. And like Iraq, the propaganda has started against Iran. Now we have the US army claiming that Taliban fighters are training in Iran. Never mind that Shi'ite Iran and Sunni Taliban can't even agree on how to run a theocracy, the important point is that the military now has an excuse for it's poor performance in the never ending war in Afghanistan and the corporate media has a new scare to wave at the television watchers.

Who Are These Clowns And Why Do We Deign It To Pay Them $165,000 A Year

Whether you think the US is a democracy or a republic, the truth is it's neither, we no longer have any form of representative government at all.
Exhibit A, the "health care reform". While most Americans support fixing our health care system, offering a medicare buy in and a public option, what we are getting is the individual mandate, a law designed to line the pockets of the health insurance industry. Capitalism sucks bad enough, but when you force uninsured citizens to buy a product from a private concern rather than a government entity, you have taken another step towards the corpocracy.
Exhibit B, war with Iran. Most Americans don't want us to undertake another military confrontation, we haven't made any progress with the two we're already mired in. War with Iran will costs us more money, more lives, and more at the gas pump. Last time gas prices topped $4.00 a gallon, the economy went into a tailspin, another period of high gas prices and you might as well start stocking up on pencils to sell on Wall Street. Aha, you say, but we're not at war with Iran yet. Yet, of course, being the operative word in that statement. Because, you see, next week is the Aip[ac conference and this year, the lobby has built its annual conference, and its entire lobbying agenda around the issue of Iran. I know, I know, Iran actually hasn't done anything wrong, per se, but that didn't stop the US from invading Iraq, so what makes you think Iran will be any different. Well, you say, the Democratic party was given control of congress and the White House by progressives Americans opposed to the ongoing wars. And since that time, the party has done absolutely nothing to end either quagmire. In fact President Obama has even crossed the border of Afghanistan into Pakistan (well not, President Obama himself, of course), so you could even say he has increased the Pax Americana of the Bush administration. And with that in mind, there's no reason he wouldn't continue that Bush administration policy of the US military as the world's police force by bombing Iran for doing something that is well with in it's rights as both a sovereign nation as well as a signee to the NNPT.
So there you have it, two pieces of evidence that our representatives don't represent us at all. Instead, we have a bunch of jokers who sole purpose in life seems to be to grow fat off the public tit (ever see a skinny senior congressperson?) while doing the work of everybody save their constituency. It's become the new American dream.

The Country Has Been Divided For A While Now, You Were Just Too Busy Jacking Off To Commander Codpiece To Notice

Let it be said that although I voted for Barack Obama, I have to this date not been happy with his performance thus far. He has spent too much time looking for a "bipartisan" solution instead of doing what needs to be done. The opposition party has left him out to dry because they only know how to create more problems and not solve them. The problems now facing this country were not brought in by President Obama when he took office, they were there already before he was even elected.
The health care crisis has been going on for twenty years, much of it with Republican control of Congress, and they have done nothing because they don't understand that it's not the quality of car offered by the finest doctors in the world, it's the inaccessibility for millions of Americans due to lack of insurance, or, for those with insurance, the inability to receive the care they need because their providers have denied it to them after taking their money.
In fact, if you named every problem facing the US and it can be directly traced back to the previous administration and it's inability to govern. President Obama is just the person who has to be the adult and fix these problems while the robber barons and banksters sit on their pile of money counting every dime they have ripped off from the US taxpayers.
So when Michael "Savage" Weiner says President Obama ripped the country in half in only one year, I would have to disagree. No, it was the people such as Michael Weiner, the Glenn Becks and their ilk who decided that they didn't like having a black and Democratic president in the White House that have ripped this country apart.
President Obama didn't create the huge deficit, it was there when he got there and people like Michael Weiner cheered on the previous administration as they poured money down the outhouse in wars of choice such as Iraq. Michael Weiner cheered as former President Bush mismanaged the war in Afghanistan, dragging that conflict out longer than any other war we have been involved in. Where were the Michael savages and Glenn Becks and other tea baggers when those cesspools were opened up for our tax dollars to be poured endlessly into?
The reality is, the country has been ripped apart for some time now. It's been nearly seven years now that President Bush unilaterally violated international law and invaded a sovereign nation with no just cause. There were lots of protests, the "liberal" media chose to ignore them, and the "free speech zones" created by the criminal-in-chief insured he'd never become aware of them, neither would you, Mr. Weiner, or the American people. No, the right was living in a fantasy world were everybody had better stand behind the president in a time of war, and conveniently forgot it once the new president represented the two things that scare you more than getting on a plane full of Muslims.
So now, the only thing you can blame on President Obama is the fact that he opened your eyes to a country so polarized that each side has created it's own separate reality, where truth is subjective and lies are acceptable if they help to prop up your insane belief system.

Just When You Think He Couldn't Get Any Stupider, Glenn Beck Proves You Wrong

Welcome to the New McCarthyism. Paranoid personality disorder Glenn Beck sees anti-Americanism everywhere. He rants and rants against voices that are disparate and different from his own, people who haven't had it as easy as himself.
And sometimes, he has to go back, way back, almost twenty five years, before he can find something for himself to get himself into a tizzy over.
Case in point: Bruce Springsteen's song, 'Born In The USA', is anti American. No fucking shit. Well, it's not as anti-American as much as it is critical of a system that creates endless wars, inescapable debt, corporate prisons and no hope for working people. And it's the same song that twenty five years ago the sainted Ronald Reagan wanted to use as his campaign theme song. And now he just listened to the lyrics? Good thing he's not in charge of Homeland Security.
It's all part of the ongoing class war where the haves criticize the have-nots for not being happy with the crumbs they are being offered. Everything Beck rails against, health care reform, social and economic justice, are all the concerns of the people who work hard and are compensated poorly for their sweat. All so a useless corporate shill like Beck can interpret twenty-five year old rock music written by musicians opposed to the repressive agenda of the corporatocracy.

The Philosophical Disparity Between Glenn Beck And Reality

Today at work, I was told by a customer that if I did not offer a fish entree tomorrow, I was going to Hell.
Sure, I thought, right after I visit the Merry Old Land of Oz.
For centuries the church has been a source of brainwashing of it's followers, from "don't eat meat on Friday during Lent" to "don't vote for a homosexual baby killer Democrat". It's worked because, as George Carlin once said, once you get people to believe in an invisible man in the sky, you can get them to believe anything. As long as it's approved by by Glenn Beck.
So if your church begins to preach the teachings of Jesus Christ, you know love thy neighbors, and all that crap that Christians rarely take to heart, "run as fast as you can. Social justice and economic justice, they are code words. Now, am I advising people to leave their church? Yes!". (Don't worry, Glenn. Your magic underwear will protect you from thoughts of social and economic justice.)
Now we see the rights plans laid bare: they oppose justice in any form. The social programming language of capitalist authoritarianism seeks to activate personal greed, intellectual insecurity and visceral racism as motivators of guided popular political reaction. So even though the basis for Christianity is kindness and sharing, if your pastor mentions social or economic justice, he's a commie. Or a Nazi. All you really need to know, beyond the philosophical disparity between the two, is Glenn Beck has done the thinking for you, and has decided that they're both really bad. And besides, those people who call for economic and social justice are, you know, those people. And if those people are in your church, better run as fast as you can, because there is no difference between, say, the Lutherans and the Baptists. Really.

Endless War In A Service Economy

Growing up, my Grandfather had a cabin in Northern Michigan, on an inland lake, a log cabin he had built himself. On one corner of his property was a trailer, a two-wheeled trailer, with the axle in the center and some sort of railing around it, used for hauling wood from the forest, or garbage to the dump. When it was parked, and empty, one end stuck up in the air while the other touched the ground, much the way a see-saw looks when nobody's riding it. As children, we would stand at the lower end of the trailer and run up towards the high end, until that fell with a crash, and we were on the low end again, which caused us to laugh.
It's kind of like our political system. While at the edges, there are those who are doggedly right or left, liberal or conservative, Republican or Democratic, the bulk of American voters run from on side to the other. After several years of Bush cutting taxes and increasing spending started to put a damper on things, voters, the same voters who had voted Bush and Republican previously, ran to high end of the trailer, hoping that the Democrats would change things. Like they had promised. And while the system sank deeper into the shit, those on the right cynically asked "How's all that hope and change working out for ya? To which I reply, about as well as your cynicism and stagnation are working out for you, but I digress.
But as voters run from one side to the other, nobody seems to notice they're not getting anywhere. Things aren't getting better. There getting worse. The party we have chosen as leaders have decided they don't want to do anything that isn't bi-partisan. I guess they don't want to take the blame if things go wrong. The other party is offering nothing new, the same old tax-cuts-and increased-spending solution.
Our time is coming soon. Our schools are running out of funding. Our states are falling deeper into debt. Some can't even pay your income tax refund. Our politicians, both parties, have traded our future for endless war in a service economy. A lot of them are walking away this year, with a pension and a lifetime of free medical care. Most of them into a lobbying position with some mega-corporation that hasn't stolen enough from us. And what will we do about it?
Run to the higher end of the trailer, of course.

Tne Unbrainwashed 2010 Academy Awards Pick For Best Picture

I have a general disdain for awards shows. I don't care what celebrities are wearing to draw attention to themselves and away from more deserving entities. I'm not big on production numbers nor the comedy stylings of Bruce Vilanch. I don't really care which actor or actress wins a statuette.
That being said, this is a prediction of what I think will win the best picture award, but what I think SHOULD win the best picture. I say this because I know that the academy voters have passed on nominated movies such as Fargo and Pulp Fiction to give the best picture to lesser, weaker, stupider movies.
And, this year, with the academy nominating ten pictures instead of the usual five, I feel very good that I have actually seen over half the nominated films. Most years, I'm lucky to see one.
Avatar-This movie was groundbreaking in the visual effects department. But a Snickers bar on a silver platter is still a Snickers bar. Besides the predictability of the plot line and the stock cliche characters, it wasn't even that good of a story. I don't think it will win, and I don't think it should, either.
The Blind Side-This is one of those weepy feel-good movies. Usually they win, because Hollywood likes being manipulated as much as the rest of the people. I haven't seen it, because I'm not a fan of sports movies or Sandra Bullock. And I don't think it should win.
District 9-I liked this picture. It's visual effects could and plot line should have taught James Cameron that money and technology isn't everything. But as much as I liked it, I don't think it was the best picture I've seen this year. Or last year.
An Education-Another British period piece costume drama. Usually these win. I haven't seen it. And even if it does pull an upset, I don't think I ever would.
The Hurt Locker-I'm not too fond of propaganda pieces. At least Katherine Bigelow's ex-husband had the sense to make the occupying force the bad guys and the insurgency the good guys. It was a compelling piece of work, still, not the best film I saw last year.
Inglorious Basterds-Quentin Tarantino has made a lot of good movies. Some of them have been nominated for Oscars and lost to lesser films. I found this film to have too many slow and dull parts for me. Still, if it pulled an upset, I wouldn't be.
Precious: Based On The Novel Push By Sapphire-Boy, there's mouthful in a title. Couldn't just call it Push or Precious, could they? There are some movies I wouldn't mind seeing win, just to insure that the Sandra Bullock movie doesn't. I haven't seen this one, but if it does win, I might feel compelled to check it out at sometime, but a lot of it seems like what I live around everyday.
A Serious Man-The Coen Brothers. Someday, this will rank up there with their other cult classics like Fargo, The Big Lebowski, O Brother, Where Art Thou, and my all time favorite Miller's Crossing. (No Country For Old Men being somewhat of an anomaly as it's based on outside work)Still, as big of a Coen Bros fan as I am, I cannot say this was the best picture I saw that was produced last year.
UP-The people at Pixar know what they're doing. They have yet to make a truly awful movie, which is made more amazing since they have become part of Disney. This is almost a shoo-in to win Best Animated Feature, but really, most of Avatar is as computer generated as this movie, but this has a better storyline. It has the best score of any of the movies I've seen, and it has the most heart. It's not maudlin like some Sandra Bullock weeper, it's not as manipulative either. In short, it is the best picture that I saw last year, and if this were a perfect world (and if it were, I'm sure I would find some minuscule fault with it), Up would win the Oscar for best picture.
Up In The Air-The only movie on this list that I haven't seen, but, win or lose, would still wish to, it seems like a movie I might enjoy. The trailer looked good, but so did the trailer for The Men Who Stare At Goats, which I did see, but did not get nominated for an award. And it's theme of corporate downsizing is timely as well. As sure as I am of it being a good movie, I am sure that UP is better.
So there you are. I'm sure many people will disagree with about UP, but, hey, that's why we have a comments section. What are your picks? Or do you care less about this than I?

The New American Terrorist or Keep Your Bible Out Of My Ass Unless You Want To Get Shit On It

In the days following 9/11, the country was together like never before in history. United We Stand stickers decorated vehicles from the lowliest rusting Honda to the mightiest gas sucking Hummer. We were as one.
We were united against a common enemy, terrorists who would use violence and intimidation against civilians in order to impose their limited religious views on them. These people hated us, we were told, because we were free.
Welcome to Amarillo.
In Amarillo, there's a new brand of terrorists, cowards who bully people who have chosen to enjoy the freedoms granted to them by the (once) greatest country that has ever existed. Under the guise of Christian Patriotism they harass and intimidate those with whom they do not agree. Gays. "Swingers". Environmentalists. Liberals. People who celebrate Halloween. Pornography shops.
Yes, the people of Amarillo are being terrorized by Repent Amarillo, a self proclaimed "Army of God" who enjoy dressing up like soldiers and using intimidation tactics against their fellow Americans, instead of becoming real soldiers and fighting America's real enemies, the Muslim heathens who attacked us on 9/11. Or, if they didn't attack us, practice a form of the religion of those that did. They have become even more evil than Liz Cheney, if that's possible.
And so now a country once united has become divided into hate groups: people who use their bible as reinforcement for their phobic beliefs of groups they do not understand, people who love to drop bombs on people with belief systems different than theirs but don't want to pay the taxes to fund the bombings, and the the Republican Party. They have destroyed this country much better than alQaeda could have ever dreamed of doing.

The Moron Parent Nanny State Strikes Again!

I'll admit to being a fan of The Office. One of my favorite episodes is when Michael Scott(Steve Carrell) attends an improv class, and every skit he's involved in ends up with him pointing his finger like a gun and "shooting" his class mates, until, out of frustration, his teacher tells him he can no longer use his "gun" in class.
So it was with some amusement that I read about a kindergartner suspended making a gun with his hand. At first, I thought, how ridiculous. Little boys have been doing this for years, and it's not like his finger is going to go off and accidentally shoot some one. It's just another example of the overprotective politically correct nanny state taking it out on some poor little boy. But then I read more:

School officials allege Mason had displayed this kind of behavior for several months, despite numerous warnings."

Jammer's mother, Erin Jammer, received a warning about it Friday, and spoke with him about it.Here's where the problem for me begins. The school contacted little Mason's mother about this and she did nothing to stop the problem. You see, I'm all for pretend gun ownership, but when you start pointing your finger gun at other people, that's when other people's right to not have a finger gun pointed at them becomes more important. And if your child's school contacts you about a problem with your son at school, it's your responsibility to act like a parent and make sure the problem is solved.
I pity poor Mason Jammer. He's not going to go far in life because his parents have refused to engage him at an early age and teach him the qualities that make a good human being. Instead, they have left it up to the already overburdened public school system so they can spend more time watching Judge Judy, playing on Farmville or any number of things that WT do when they should be imparting what little if any wisdom they have to their offspring. If you have any questions why are country is so fucked up, look no farther than Erin Jammer and her inability to raise a decent human being.

An Unbrainwashed Primer On Hate Groups

See Bill Donohue.
He is president of the Catholic League.
He likes to condemn things.
He condemns movies and television shows that might cause his followers to think.
He condemns advertising that relays messages that he doesn't agree with.
He condemns the use of condoms.
Condemn, condemn, condemn.
Recently, he condemned the meeting of officials from the Justice and Health and Human Services departments with representatives of the Secular Coalition for America, an umbrella group that includes American Atheists and the Council for Secular Humanism.
He denounced them as a 'hate group'.
A definition of 'condemn' is " to pronounce judgment against, to sentence". In other words, to hate.
Oddly enough, Mr. Donohue has never condemned pedophiliac priests. Because his bible says, 'judge not, lest ye be judged'.

See Fred Phelps.
He is the pastor at the Westboro Baptist Church.
He has a direct connection to his god.
His god tells him to hate things.
He protests funerals of gay people.
He protests funerals of soldiers fallen in the war in Iraq.
Reverend Phelps claims that his god is the Christian god of love.
Someday, Fred will die.
No one will protest his funeral.




See Council Nedd.
He is the leader of In God We Trust, an organization dedicated to protecting America's religious heritage.
Like the Salem witch trials, the Boston Martyrs, and the KKK.
Council Nedd describes the Secular Coalition for America as "some of the most hate-filled, anti-religious groups in the nation".
He must not think that the biggest number of hate groups in the nation derive from the Christian Right.
Poor Old Nedd.











This is Marion "Pat"Robertson.
A Christian leader, "Pat" is one of the most hate filled leaders in Christianity.
He denounces other religions as "demonic".
He openly calls for murder of other country's leaders.
He claims a hate crime bill is "noose around the neck of Christians".
He has claimed that Hurricane Katrina was a punishment by god for America's alleged sins.
He has stated that gay marriage will lead to bestiality.
He blames the earthquake in Haiti on a pact with the devil.
He has slammed Muslims as worse than Nazis.
In short, he is one of the most hate filled men in charge of one of the most hated filled religions and has met directly with presidents, then lied about what was said at such meetings.



Atheists have never called to bomb a sovereign nation as our elected Christians have done.
Atheists would never condemn a minority for not having the same belief system as they.
Atheists have never justified killing in the name of some unseen deity.
No, atheists have never advocated killing anyone for any reason.
Maybe that is why their voice has been kept out of the White House for 234 years. And look where that got us.

CNN Poll Reveals Most Americans Easily Led

The job of the corporate media in our society is to keep people so pumped full of fear that reason steps out the door and illogic prevails. Remember last fall, when fears of an H1N1 pandemic were relayed by the news media? People lined up and waited for flu shots and cursed the government for not producing enough to keep them safe when they couldn't get one immediately.
But, like Saddam's weapons of mass destruction, the pandemic never occurred, and now with the flu season almost at an end, it doesn't appear that we will have one this year.
This fear is nothing new. Ever since the dawn of the atomic age, fear has been used to sell us everything from mouthwash, deodorant, and shampoo to multi-billion dollar nuclear weapons defense systems. It's a formula that hasn't failed capitalism yet, because it works so effectively.
And it works to this day. How else can you explain the fact that 71% of Americans think Iran has the "bomb"? They don't of course, but the disinformation and misinformation that has flowed from both our corporate political sources as well as the "librul" media has convinced the majority of Americans that something that doesn't exist actually does. A nuclear boogeyman from a country that has called for total nuclear disarmament. Up is down, black is white and the stimulus is working.
Even though our own intelligence sources say that there are no nuclear weapons in Iran, a full 25% think we should bomb them right now!. That's right around the number of people who still identify themselves with the Republican Party. Yes, we should start another war because the ones we're fighting now are going along nicely.
I mean, that's not enough time, but when I see Susan Rice on the news stating that Iran hasn't lived up to it's expectations concerning it's nuclear program, well, as a co-signer of the NNPT, neither has the US. Instead of threatening them with sanctions, are duty is to ensure that they are able to develop nuclear power with co-operation, and assistance. That would be too sensible. First we have to blast them to smithereenies, then the taxpayers can pay to rebuild the entire country again.
Provided, of course, they are led to believe that they can.

Those With Stained Glass Windows Should Not Be Casting Stones

Former Pop Music superstar Elton John has stirred up some controversy by suggesting Jesus was gay

"I think Jesus was a compassionate, super-intelligent gay man who understood human problems"

Plus, he never got married, had sex, or was romantically linked to a female. Elton John was a major music superstar in the seventies who was also one of the first to publicly declare their gayness. So I'm assuming he has a finely tuned gaydar.
The Catholic League, protector of all things Jesus, responded with their own ludicrousity:"to call Jesus a homosexual is to label him a sexual deviant".
No, Mr. Donohue, Elton John was not suggesting that Jesus was what like so many Catholic priests have been accused of, he was merely suggesting that many of the qualities Jesus possessed are shared by a large number of gays. He wasn't a kiddie raper, that's what the Catholic Church has spent many years covering up and paying millions of dollars to obscure. There's your sexual deviancy.

Excuse Me, Mr. President, But Your Hypocrisy Is Showing

President Barack Obama took Tuesday a major bet on nuclear power, announcing eight billion dollars in loan guarantees to build the first new plant on US soil in nearly 30 years.
Uh, hello?
The United States has endless amounts of coal, all we have to do is blow the top off a couple of mountains, and there it is, ready for the taking. Not only that, but we can harvest the wind as well, that's a clean and unlimited source of energy as well. especially around Washington DC, where right and left wing wind bags are always blowing. So why build nuclear power plants?
Does this mean we're going to impose sanctions on ourself? Perhaps the Israeli premier will travel to Russia to push for crippling sanctions against the US.
No?
Well, despite the fact that there's no credible evidence that Iran has a nuclear weapons program, even with Secretary of State Clinton putting Iran in the impossible position of proving a negative, the push to punish Iran for doing the same thing that President Obama just announced plans to do seems a tad....hypocritical. Did I say a tad? I meant overwhelmingly hypocritical.

If You're Stupid And You Know It, Raise Your Sign!

I have a lot of idiosyncrasies that bother me, but my biggest pet peeve is bad spelling. I have on occasion let a few slip by, if only because I've had disagreements with my spellcheck, I'm not going to let some machine tell me I can't invent words, or compound them, dammit, I'm a professional writer. Nothing makes a person look stupid than a misspelled word.
This goes back to former VP Dan Quayle and his inability to spell the simplest of words. I was working with a Dittohead at the time, and they insisted there was nothing wrong with the next in line to be leader of the "free" world being too stupid to know how to spell a tuber. (I am now Facebook friends with the guy and have noticed numerous misspellings in his status updates, the latest being "comming", and no, he didn't mean that)

(Picture poached from Born At The Crest of the Empire)


(Many more examples available here)
It's easy to see why our country is in the state it's in: there are just too many dumbfucks out there. They believe what they're told by right wing gate keepers because they lack the critical processes to think for themselves. They are just a bunch of brain damaged beer swilling, Nascar loving, television watchers.

If you've ever wondered where politicians like Michelle Bachmann, Sarah Palin, or George W Bush come from, look no further. It's because of idiots like these, that ultimately, our country is doomed.
(Cross posted at American Insurgency)

Tin Foil Hat Time:Redefining Crazy

America is supposed to be a Union, but right now, it is about as divided as a nation can be. Our political system has failed because a servant cannot serve two masters at once. They can not placate the people who elected them while simultaneously placating the special interests that funded their election. This has led to a top-down lack of leadership, as politicians walk a tightrope between what they have pledged to voters and what their financiers will let them accomplish.
Our country has now fractured and divided it self into many different groups, each with a represent belief system that appears like insanity to those outside of it. The birthers, for instance, in spite of evidence to the contrary being presented, still believe that President Obama was not born in Hawaii, but rather some distant African nation, thereby leaving him unqualified to hold the office for which he was elected. The Tea party, as another example, believe that taxes are too high and government spending is out of control, yet refuse to give up pouring money into the quagmires of Iraq and Afghanistan, and actually believe we should spend more money in places like Pakistan, Yemen, and Iran.
Then there are the Truthers, people who do not believe in the official government conspiracy theory for 9/11. Since 84% of the American people do not believe what the government has told us about 9/11, that makes them a majority. And it also means that despite a mountain of evidence contrary to the 'official' conspiracy theory, Truthers are the crazies and people who believe that 19 Saudi men (7 of whom are amazingly still alive), hijacked planes that they could barely fly through the most secure airspace in the world crashing them into steel frame buildings, causing fires that impossibly caused the steel to melt despite the presence of asbestos in the towers, and was so devastating that a building untouched by the jets collapsed are considered to be normal and sane.
Our government lies to us all the time. They lied about we needed to go into Iraq and why we need to bomb Iran. They lie about the unemployment rate and tell us recovery is happening when it isn't. It doesn't matter if you put a Republican or a Democrat in power, they still are prepared to lie to us to cover up corporate interests.
And if that makes me some sort of truther, I can live with that.

2010:Still No Change

At last Saturday's Tea party convention, professional political harpy Sarah Palin asked, mockingly, "How's that hope-y change-y thing working out for ya?", barely paraphrasing a right wing talking point from last summer. This and her eventual outrage at Rahm Emmanuel's "fucking retards" of last summer, illustrate how slow her reaction time is, as well as how out of touch she is with events going on around her.
The truth is, there is no "change-y" thing. While President Obama may have stated "even greater cooperation and understanding between nations" in his inaugural address, he has since hinted that he may go the George Bush/Dick Cheney route of unilateral action against Iran. Hell, we have them circled now, it's only a matter of time before a justification miraculously occurs, and them bombs start flying and people start dying. So other than the obvious reasons, how is Obama any different than you, Sarah Palin?
We know why the tea partiers hate President Obama so much, despite his continuation of Bush/Cheney policies. So continue to criticize him for doing things you would have backed had your party won the election. You don't seem bitter to me at all. America will always be better off without people like you who have to be reminded to lift America's spirit!

Tea Baggers, Terrorists and the Mob Mentality

Glenn Greenwald ran a post about how readily people accept what they are told, especially by our leaders. Essentially, the government claims that it can now kill anyone, even Americans overseas, by deeming them terrorists with out any due process. That whole "constitution" thing went out with the Patriot Act. And that people who may have opposed it's usage by the previous administration have no problem with President Obama making similar declarations. Much the same way the charges of socialist and communist are leveled at an obvious corporatist like our president by those on the right because they feel uncomfortable being led by someone with a darker skin tone, despite any empirical evidence.
On the right, the same thing is happening to the Tea Party movement. What began as a Libertarian anti tax movement in Chicago in 2008 has mushroomed and metamorphosed into a another arm of the Republican Party, being told to embrace the policies of that party or risk losing support from the movement itself. And while some (read the comments) may resist, the mob mentality will eventually grab hold and the GOP knows it can count on the support of those who while not ideologically aligned with Sarah Palin, will feel she is a better choice than another term of President Obama. For obvious and previously stated reasons.
It's the same mentality that has changed a championship game between the AFL and the NFL (now both the NFC and AFC arms of the NFL) 45 years ago into what is quickly becoming the national holiday. In these times of green thinking, how many of these plastic party supplies will end up rotting in a landfill? While some people will watch to root on their favorite team, more people will watch the Super Bowl for the ads than the game, which in a time of DVRs, is quite a trick on the part of advertisers. And a sign of sickness infecting the mob mentality, turning most of a nation into drunken drooling zombies, turning their memories into advertisements, their minds into pliable mush for the coming corporate state.

Ted, Just Admit It. You're A Pussy

Poor Ted Nugent. He's really upset that he doesn't realize that his music is irrelevant, or maybe his music is so irrelevant that he has to resort to making patented "outrageous" statements to get any press these days.
Mr. Nugent, famous for that one song, you know, the one that all the classic rock stations play, I think Meat Loaf sings it, let fly with said statements in an interview with culture magazine Royal Flush, a magazine that boasts a circulation of 50,000 people which, while slightly higher than the readership of this blog, is still spit in the ocean compared to real publications.
Terrible Ted says that "Barack Hussein Obama should be put in jail. It is clear that Barack Hussein Obama is a communist." So, now we should jail people for their political beliefs? The only thing that the racist "Nuge" hates about President Obama, is the fact that he's black.
Terrible Ted then goes on to list a number of people he feels should die. Pam Anderson, Bill Maher, people who step on his lawn, animal rights activists, and vegans. But most of his rage is directed towards Rolling Stone publisher Jann Wenner for "Jann Wenner won’t do a story on my sold-out tour this year because I’m on the board of directors at the NRA. Jann Wenner should die." Sold out tour? Really? I live in the heart of his happy hunting ground home state of Michigan, where every appearance he makes is covered incessantly by the local crass, er, classic rock stations, and I didn't hear a word about any tour, let alone about it being 'sold out', and since I don't believe The "Nuge" has the drawing power to fill any arena/stadium outside of Michigan, I'm sure his tour consisted of small clubs, bars and dives where alcohol soaked brains clamor for the music it remembers from a time before most the brain cells were killed by alcohol consumption.
But, really, Ted Nugent is a pussy. Given a chance back in the sixties to fulfill his anti-communist zeal and kill as many as he wanted, Nugent chickened out, and got a draft deferment. You see, the difference between shooting animals and shooting communists is that animals aren't armed with weapons trying to kill you back. Most animals just want to co-exist with their dwindling surroundings, so it's easy to sneak up on them and shoot them in the back like a coward.
So, since Mr. Nugent is unable to compose a good song on his own that might generate some airplay, or develop his stagnant guitar style which hasn't evolved since "Wango Tango", his only other alternative is to behave like a neanderthal jackass in order to draw attention to his narrow and twisted political beliefs.
Ted made a lot of money in the sixties and seventies extolling the virtues of the whole "sex, drugs, and rock and roll" lifestyle, now has the gall to criticize those poor souls who made Nugent rich taking the message to heart by becoming too incompetent to work and having far too many babies than they can afford. Ted, that makes you a fucking hypocrite, and as I have become fond of saying, you cant spell fucking hypocrite with out the GOP, of which Nugent is one of the few people left on the right willing to identify themselves with that party.
So, go ahead Ted, and blame your political affiliations for your "lack of press coverage", the truth is Ted, you are a talentless hack who lost his audience when they sobered up enough to realize just how badly you suck. The sooner you realize this, the sooner you can concentrate your attention on the one thing you do that makes you any money. Killing creatures not evolved enough to fire weapons back at you.

Ready To Kill You For Their Own Benefit

Is the US government trying to kill it's own people? According to congressional hearings held on January 27 of this year US intelligence agencies shielded the Christmas Day "underwear bomber" and stopped the State Department from revoking his Visa. It's strange that this story wasn't covered in the unbiased corporate media, after all, Fox News has been working overtime to embarrass the Obama administration, and this wold have been a perfect opportunity for them to do so.
So when intelligence chiefs warn of another attack "soon", is this wishful thinking, or prior knowledge of another operative allowed to slip through to justify military action somewhere else in the Middle East?

Apparently, Tony Blair Thinks He Has Some Credibility Left

In the run-up to Iraq War, then-British Prime Minister became known in certain circles as "Bush's Poodle", or "Phony Tony" because of his unequivocal support for the Bush(Cheney) administration's unilateral decision to violate international law and invade Iraq. Besides the Downing Street Minutes, there was the whole 'Dodgy Dossier' which even it's author states was wrong. What's more, Blair's recent refusal to apologize has hurt his party's chances in upcoming elections.
So now, with the US beefing up it's military presence in the Persian Gulf, Blair is claiming that's it's up to the world to halt Iran's nuclear program. Well, Mr. Poodle, I mean, Blair, the IAEA has yet to find that Iran is doing anything but building an nuclear reactor for anything other than peaceful purposes. So whom am I to trust? A proven liar with an agenda, or an independent international watchdog agency? If Phony Tony Baloney wants to squander what precious little political capital he has left on questionable intelligence, good luck with that. Just remember, one day when you cry 'wolf', a lot of people are just going to think poodle, and ignore you.

Christiansanity Is A Seriously Flawed Belief System

Interesting.
It seems that anti-abortion activists are angry with Scott Roeder's conviction for murder in the execution of Dr. George Tiller. Maybe it's the life sentence they don't like, perhaps they feel the death penalty is more in order, since their Bible demands "an eye for an eye". After all, Roeder freely admitted to assassinating Dr. Tiller, so there is no question of guilt.
Well, except the Christiansane feel that the cold blooded murder of an abortion provider is justified to protect the lives of little tiny babies. Following that same spurious logic, wouldn't it be perfectly alright to gun down The Rev. Donald Spitz? After all, he condones the murder of abortion doctors by the likes of Roeder and Paul Hill, so in order to prevent more assassinations, wouldn't his murder be justified?
Americans are free to cling to any whacked out belief system they wish, from Scientology to Evangelical Christiansanity, it's when you cross the line and force that belief system on to other people that you become a criminal. If you don't like abortions, don't get one. Work hard to allow our education system to promote sex education and birth control to prevent unwanted pregnancies. That seems like a sane response to the problem, but the problem is that not only are these people ignorant to all they do not read in the Bible, but they're Christiansane as well. They all possess the dead eyes of soulless zombies. And their belief system is based on a mythology better suited to less enlightened times, when an invisible guy in the sky was the answer to all of life's mysteries, and scientists were burned at the stake as witches.

If Money Is Speech, Then Comment With Cash

Since money is speech as defined by a recent Supreme Court ruling.....
And taxation without representation is tyranny as defined by our Founding Fathers.....
If I am unable to have my fair representation in Congress due to my inability to match donations to political candidates owned by large multinational corporations whose concerns may run contrary to my own ideals.....
Why am I paying taxes?
By not paying taxes, I am saying that I no longer support the permanent national security state, which requires a perpetual enemy in order to justify it's existence. It believes that collateral damage is acceptable, I do not. It believes that those people who do not hold to the same belief system as it does deserve to die. I do not. It believes that my children, your children, and every other child with the exception of it's own must be sacrificed in order for it's continual existence. I do not.
The Corporatocratic Military State believes that money that could be spent on Universal health care for all it's citizens is better spent on munitions and armaments. I do not. It believes that money that could be spent on providing a decent education to all it's citizens is better spent on enriching a small percentage of it's citizens. I do not. It believes that money that could be spent helping out the less fortunate of it's citizens is better spent helping out the more fortunate citizens. I do not.
The Bankster and Corporate Criminal Police state would gladly exchange clean air and water for bigger profits, homes and families for bigger bonuses, and people's futures and livelihoods for a bigger market share. I would not, and I wouldn't entrust them to shepherd my future, or my children's future anymore than trust us. Innocent until proven guilty has changed into guilty until beaten by police officers. They have prepared for the worst because they know that the people won't stand for their nonsense forever. Or at least until they can no longer afford the soporific effects of cable television.

World War Four, or The New Crusades?

When are we going to finally admit that the "war with al Qaeda", the "war on terror", or perhaps even better, the Global Struggle Against Violent Extremism is in fact, another World War? Or, more fittingly, it's the new Crusades?
When the US admitted that Blackwater security forces were operating in Pakistan (then backtracked and denied it), it was essentially announcing that the new Knights Templar were continuing their crusade to wipe Islam from the planet. Follow that up with the revelation of Biblical inscriptions on military rifles, and it would appear that the US has decided to declare war on Islam. Which is weird, since President Obama is a secret Muslim.
So on one side, we have religious extremism, hell bent on imposing their views on the rest of the world while committing genocide against those who don't share their belief system. And on the other, the same thing. But only one side has the support of the world's only remaining military super power. So which is more terrifying?

Take The Democrats. Please.

Yesterday's special election in Massachusetts wasn't a referendum on President Obama, as much as right wing pundits would like you to believe, as much as it was the beginning of the end for the Democratic Party.
Like Kvatch, I believe that Scott Brown's win yesterday was good for the Democrats. They don't have to work towards passing any health care reform now, even with a majority in the House and the Senate because they don't know how to lead. Reading too much into yesterday's defeat, some of them are talking about extending the Bush tax cuts, once again showing the lack of disparity between the two parties. And Joe Lieberman thinks they should move more to the right.
In 2008, the Democratic Party ran on, and won the election on some fairly forward thinking ideas. Now, it turns out, they don't actually want to enact any of these ideas, because they're afraid of the opposition party, of which only 22% of Americans identify themselves with. So why are they pandering to twenty two percent of the population?
Ultimately, the election was a referendum on the stupidity of the average voter. Don't like the way Democrats are doing things? Vote for the Republican! Republicans run the country into the ground? Hmmm, who should I vote for now. It's no wonder the Teabaggers have gotten some traction. Sure they may be insane, but at least they're not the same old crap.

Small Change Is Better Than Nothin' At All

I'll admit it, I'm sick of politics. One side may claim moral superiority over the other, but the truth is, it's a just a game designed to distract us while the looters strip every last dime from as many people as they can. And I will gleefully admit bitter disappointment with the Obama administration for failing to pass on the change they promised in the last election. But that disappointment is all with myself, for being stupid enough to believe that any candidate is going to do anything that the corpocracy hasn't already pre-approved.
That's why I bring up this story. It seems that while President Obama was in Massachusetts stumping for a Democratic candidate their, he was openly heckled by a crowd member. It brought a smile to my face, because I can remember a time not too long ago when something like that would never have happened. A time when political rallies weren't so open, crowds were vetted better than a Republican vice-presidential candidate, and protesters were delegated to "free speech zones" where they could protest all they wanted....far, far away from anybody they might wish to protest against. So while it is a small change, it still represents some changes from the oppressive Cheney/Bush regime. So it doesn't matter that the people of Massachusetts have decided to elect as their senator some one who thinks anal rape is funny, those Massholes appear to have the collective intelligence as a crate of cantaloupe.

The Crippled Epistemology Of The American People

President Obama's appointee to the head of the Office of Information and Regulatory Affairs advocates infiltrating 9/11 Truth groups. In a paper published in 2008, Cass Sunstein says that conspiracy theories arise not from irrationality or mental illness, but rather than a crippled epistemology in the form of a sharply limited number of news sources. Given that only five corporations control what the majority of Americans watch and read as news, doesn't that mean that all Americans suffer from this? And, since most people choose one or maybe two news sources, why isn't their judgment being called in to question?
Because the sources chosen by the majority of Americans do two things. They all sell the idea that any problem can be solved through the magick of market based capitalism. Even those problems, such as obesity, which are caused by capitalism. Secondly, they propagate a myth that our political system works, as long as you keep voting for the two major parties. Never mind that the stewardship of the Republican and Democratic parties have done nothing for anybody not connected monetarily to the corpocracy.
In 2008, Prof. Sunstein suggested infiltrating the 9/11 Truth movement in order to undermine it, enlisting nongovernmental officials to rebut the theories that run counter to the official government conspiracy theory. Given that many people still believe President Obama was born in Kenya, despite evidence to the contrary being provided, all I can say is, Good luck with that.

Specious Reasoning In The New American Babylon

I find it interesting (and even a little bit racist) that Pat Robertson blames the earthquake in Haiti on a curse due to that country's 'pact with the devil'. The global warming climate change cult wonders if global warming had something to do with it. Next, Dick Cheney will blame the Obama administration's lack of desire to label WWIII as "the war on terror", while the Teabaggers will blame it on excessive taxes and intrusive government programs.
Me, I noticed this happened right after Sarah Palin began her position as a contributor to Fox News.........

Hooter Nation News Network

Journalistic integrity has been on life support for sometime now. The American Idiocracy's obsession with celebrity has so permeated our society that even a "serious" news site like The Huffington Post is skewered towards celebrity that I won't visit it any more. Except, of course, to see which starlet stripped for which magazine cover, in an obvious and desperate attempt at attention.
Fox News, since it's inception, has been devoid of anything remotely approaching journalistic integrity. Whether it still clings to it's "we distort/you decide", I don't know, but just when you think they could get more biased, they show us all how one sided they are: Fox News has hired Sarah Palin as a contributor to it's network. This comes as a shock to no one, I suppose. Palin will fit right in with all the other "anchorwoman" on Fox whose short skirts provide eye candy for crusty conservatives who are just one mouse click away from watching The Naked News anyway.
Is this where have ended up as a society? The only way a woman can be validated is if she's reasonably attractive, wears short skirts and tight sweaters? Some may call it empowerment, but has Fox hired Olympia Snowe as a contributor?
We are a nation of Hooters patrons. Obese and grubby men who drool at anything in a tight shirt like a bunch of hormone raging adolescents. Stripper poles have become standard boudoir accessories that even teenage girl role models have no problem posing on. And as the blood drains from the big head to the littler one, our ability to think clearly is clearly diminished. How else can you explain all those Palin fans?

An Elephant Can Only Remember How To Get Peanuts

"We had no domestic attacks under Bush. We've had one under Obama."

-Rudy Giuliani, speaking on ABC's Good Morning America
Am amusing thing about a party that chose an elephant (which allegedly "never forgets") as it's symbol is the way they seem to have developed convenient amnesia in their on going jihad against President Obama. Dana Perino, one of former President Bush's press secretaries made the claim earlier this year, following the shootings at FT Hood "there were no terrorists attacks in America under President Bush". This gives credence to many of the conspiracy theorists that, indeed, 9/11 wasn't a terrorist attack, but merely a false flag attack, designed to engineer support for invasion of Middle Eastern countries that happened to have a lot of oil in them, or are strategically located for helping move energy resources to market where they can be used by giant corporations to increase their profit margins.
It's as if our leaders on the right seem to hope that the nation of television watchers, memories full of which episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond they have seen, don't have room to remember anything we haven't seen on television recently. Lately RNC Chairman Michael Steele released a book, in he refers to himself as chairman at least three times, which he claims was written before he became chairman.
Which brings us to Dick Cheney, you know, the guy who has been criticizing President Obama for calling the "war on terror" the "war with al Qaeda". Cheney seems to have forgotten that two of the alleged masterminds behind the underwear bomber were released from US custody in 2007. Cheney also forgets claims made by his administration that the war in Iraq has made the world safer. How convenient.

Flying Naked Is The Next Step In Airline Safety

The latest weapon in the Global struggle Against Violent extremism, the War on Terror, the War Against alQaeda, or whatever they're calling it this week, is the full body scanner. Many US airports are rushing to have these machines installed to calm passengers who might be dissuaded from air travel following the underwear bomber scare. Sure, these nifty numbers are intrusive, unduly expose passengers to radiation, and at $150,000 a pop, pretty darn expensive as well. And sure, a lot of politicians are making money touting them as the end all answer to the problem, however, even Ann Coulter admits they're useless in probing the anal cavity.(Don't ask about Ann's anal obsession, obviously it arises from hanging around the assholes on the Right) How convenient that Canada ordered their scanners months ago, and now have an excuse to install them in their airports.
The point is, we can install them all we want in airports here, unless they're in airports overseas, they can't really protect us from those people who want to harm us because we're free to send drones into their neighbor's wedding party. The upside ti installing them is Europe is that it would discourage those pesky Europeans from visiting here, spending their money and generally walking around like they own the place. (Only the Chinese can do that)And once more, Americans can isolate themselves, wrapped in the cocoon of knowledge that, Jersey Shore notwithstanding, we are the most awesomest country on the planet.

Shooting Yourself In The Foot To Spite Your Face

Hello, everybody, I have returned once again from the land of the television watcher, where fear and loathing are peddled and logic and intelligence are ignored. The most recent case in point is the Christmas Day plane bomber. Or should I say attempted plane bomber, since, like fellow shoe bomber Richard Reid, he wasn't actually successful, unless his goal was to frighten the bejeezus out of television watchers nation wide who immediately favored US intervention in Yemen.
Yemen? Really? I thought the suspect was from Nigeria and passed through Ghana, which is like a whole continent away from Yemen. To be sure, there are a lot of America hating people in Yemen, but is that a real reason to drop bombs on a bunch of people who could care less one way or the other? Because if they don't care, one way or the other now, once US bombs began ripping apart family members, they will care one way, and it's not the way we as US citizens would like them to care. Using the US military to intervene in a country that had nothing to do with the "terrorist" attack, while sounding vaguely Bush-like and familiar, makes about as much sense as swatting a fly with a battleship. It's very unwieldy, and will kill a lot more than the fly.
All this really does is illustrate how the corporatist agenda of Total Global Domination puts Americans at risk, and as long as we continue to cede power to them, we all are at risk.

War Propaganda Never Sleeps, Not Even For The War On Christmas

Did Iran seize and Iraqi oil well or didn't they? When the Iranian Cyber Army takes down Twitter, preventing millions of Americans from following the mundane activities of the people on their lists, who really benefits?

The Rich Man's News Network

In their continuing war against the working class, Fox News made the pronouncement that cutting minimum wage is good for workers. How? Well, according to Fox, lower wages creates more jobs, which is good for workers, because if they're making less than $7.25 an hour, they're going to need more jobs to able survive.
It seems to me that I've heard this before. Oh, yeah, that was the same claim that was made about Nafta, about how it was going to create all these new jobs. Well, we know how that turned out. It didn't.
As the middle class evaporates so that the top ten percent of the country can have more money, our corporatist legislatures are looking for more ways to screw the working people out of what little they have. The latest plan from the working people hatin' Republicans is eliminating unemployment benefits for the victims of the corporcratic economic policies.
I think there's a pretty good chance that our current congress is out of touch. With their heel-dragging on health care reform, and now this pronouncement, I don't think a lot of them realize that there are people who don't live in gated communities, drive SUVs, or have stock portfolios. People who are a paycheck away from total destitution. Or, more probably, they know it and just don't give a fuck, since people like that can never afford to donate money to the GOP.

2009:The Year Of No Change

Events of the past few weeks have only gone on to underline my underlying belief that our political system is a corporatocracy, that there is no real difference between Republicans and Democrats (although, oddly enough, I don't care for Republicans at all).
Matt Taibbi writes of how President Obama campaigned on a platform of change and reform , then replaced most of his staff with Wall St insiders once elected. No change there.
Sarah Palin praises President Obama's Peace Prize speech as something that could have been taken from the pages of her memoirs. Since Palin is an acolyte of neocon leader Bill Kristol, the man behind the Bush administration's foreign policy, once again, no change.
Defense Secretary Robert Gates said on Friday he expected the international community to impose significant additional sanctions against Iran over its nuclear program. Even though there is no evidence that Iran is seeking nuclear weapons, and has every right to seek nuclear power for peaceful purposes as a member of the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty, the US is still laying the ground work for some sort of military strike against Iran.Like I said, no change.

How To Write Books For Morons And Make Millions

President Obama, who won the last presidential election with not only a majority of electoral votes, but winning the popular vote as well, is perceived by many to be a liberal, or, if you will, a "progressive", even by those who voted for him. That must mean that by logical extension, a majority of Americans view themselves as liberals (or progressives). Following that same logical conclusion, therefore, those who consider themselves conservatives (or reactionaries) who hate liberals and claim to love this country (because liberals hate America)despise a majority of the people within it. Which leads me to the question: can you love a country while simultaneously hating most of the people who reside there?
Conservatives (really reactionaries) have built an industry of writing books about how liberals have destroyed America. Ann Coulter, Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly, and even god bless him, Joe the Plumber have written books about how much they love America and hate liberals. These books frequently make the best sellers list (with the exception of Joe the Plumber's book, which is now on the remainder rack at the local Bargain Barn), embraced by those who need reaffirmation that their political view is the sole acceptable view.
The latest entry into this market is by Fox News reporter John Gibson. His book, entitled How the Left Swiftboated America: The Liberal Media Conspiracy to Make You Think George W. Bush Was the Worst President in History. The problem is that for years those on the right have decried the "swiftboat" term as a 'hate term'. As Sean Hannity put it: "I am tired of this word 'swift boat' being used as a pejorative..When we talk about the Swift Boat Vets for Truth, these are brave American heroes." The point which sails over Hannity's head of course, is that so was John Kerry. The Swiftboaters, as they came to be known, were in fact funded by a donor to the Republican party.
Gibson's book tries to simultaneously change the perception that the Bush administration was an abysmal failure while blaming that perception on the "liberal" media. This from a "journalist" who works for a "news" outlet caught stage managing an anti-Obama protest. The "liberal' media didn't have to do anything of that nature, all it had to was honestly report on the Bush administration, as he was the worst president in history.

The Terrorist Attack That Never Was

No, I don't mean 9/11, but I've been following a story at TPM concerning one Tedd J Petruna who claims to have thwarted Muslim terrorists on a flight he wasn't even on. The FAA investigated and found no violations ever took place. The story goes like this: Muslims, in full attire create a ruckus and refuse to turn off their electronic equipment before take-off. When a flight attendant asked them to turn it off, one of them yelled "Shut up, infidel dog."

This is where I had had enough! I got up and started to the back where I heard a voice behind me from another Texan twice my size say "I got your back." I grabbed the man who had been on the phone by the arm and said "you WILL go sit down or you Will be thrown from this plane!" As I "led" him around me to take his seat, the fellow Texan grabbed him by the back of his neck and his waist and headed out with him. I then grabbed the 2nd man and said, "You WILL do the same!"

And how did he know he was a fellow Texan? He wore cowboy boots, a cowboy hat, a bolo tie, and had a giant belt buckle in the shape of Texas as he held his pistols in the air, like this fellow:
Mr. Petruna told his story in an email that was sent to friends and family members, including one Gene Hackemack, who passed it along with this introduction:
"the muslims are all getting very brave now, since they have one of their own in the white house." The story then was picked up by right wing blogs like this one where the misspellings in the comments section illustrate the average intelligence of those on the right.
This clearly illustrates how the right wing paranoia has taken over their party. Not only are "Muslims in full attire" taking over our airplanes, but our White House as well. Even though the alleged hijackers/terrorists violated many laws, they were allowed back on the plane. Probably by the Muslim in the White House. It's evident Mr. Petruna has a Rambo complex (he was able to overpower 11 men with the aid of a Texan saying those mighty words "I Got Your Back") And, like a Rambo movie, all the characters were stereotypes.

And They Wonder Why No One Trusts Their Judgement

Outside a small circle of Americans, Fox News, and far right whack jobs, no one really takes the Tea Party Movement seriously. And, honestly, how can you? Glenn Beck, Michelle Bachmann, and Sarah Palin, their de facto leaders have proven themselves to be a couple sandwiches short of a picnic. They claim to be Christian while displaying utter contempt for their fellow human who does not believe as they do.
And the name these conservatives chose for themselves? Well, now that they know it's other definition, Teabaggers don't like the label they have been given. By themselves. No body gave it to them, they chose it for themselves, and now, they don't like to be called it.
I can understand them not using the Urban Dictionary, after all, these people are suburbanites. And urban connotes something more akin to President Obama than they care to be at any given time. How out of the loop did they have to had been to not know what popular usage of the phrase meant? I'm sure they think that a hot karl has something to do with Karl Rove.
Conservatives like to play the victim when they're not in charge. But in this case, they're victims of nothing but their own ignorance.

President Obama Wants To Make Me Gay!

Of all the powers afforded the president by the Constitution, I didn't realize this was in there but apparently according to the Family Research Council, President Obama will impose homosexuality and silence Christianity. I realize he had the power to impose martial law, but homosexuality?
While the upside to this is I might get laid more often, or find a life partner I can share a wardrobe with, the downside is YOU CAN'T MAKE SOMEONE BE SOMETHING THEY ARE NOT!!!!
I have always found the Religious Right's homophobia to be a leetle bit suspect. Why fear queers when you can just say no? Unless you can't resist.

'Untrammeled homosexuality can take over and destroy a social system. If you isolate sexuality as something solely for one's own personal amusement, and all you want is the most satisfying orgasm you can get - and that is what homosexuality seems to be - then homosexuality seems too powerful to resist. The evidence is that men do a better job on men and women on women, if all you are looking for is orgasm .... It's pure sexuality. It's almost like pure heroin. It's such a rush. . . . Marital sex tends toward the boring end. Generally, it doesn't deliver the kind of sheer sexual pleasure that homosexual sex does.'" [Michigan Journal of Gender & Law, Chaos, Law, and God: The Religious Meanings of Homosexuality, 2008]

Now, if the 'anointed one' has this kind of power, I just wish he'd use it to make me slimmer, but if he can make you gay, well, then you'd better bow down to him now, because it looks like he's already started.